"I'll try not to be offended."
She glanced down at her watch. "I know you said you wanted to talk, but I have an interview in an hour. I need to shower and get ready."
Eli ran a hand down over his beard. "Holly, I know about the interview. Penn told me about it."
"She did?" Holly brushed a lock of purple hair behind her ear. "She wasn't supposed to do that."
"She wanted me to convince you not to go to California."
She swallowed as she met his gaze. "Is that why you're here? Because of Penn?"
"No," he murmured. "I'm here because of me. Because of us. You can't move away, Holly."
"Well, I can't stay here." She held her arms out at her sides. "Eli, I can't find a job here. I've sent tons of résumés, but Lyla's blackballed my name all over the place. I've tried to drum up interest in my cat health articles to get some freelance gigs, but that's not working, either. The job in California would give me health care and benefits. I need those things. Especially now."
Eli dragged his hands through his hair. "You know, I came over here last night, full of fight, determined to beg you to stay. I was going to get down on my fucking hands and knees, Holly." He paused for a moment, then drew in a breath. "Before I got here, I had a lot of shit go down. I was exhausted as hell, and as much as I would have loved to make some grand gesture to get you to forgive me, I didn't have the energy or the mental capacity to organize anything."
He scratched his jaw, then gestured at the grocery bags near the door. "So I went to Target and tried to find something meaningful that would convey how fucking sorry I was for being an asshole. I didn't know what flowers were safe for Miss, so I didn't get any. Then I wandered the aisles for an hour, trying to figure out what to do."
He walked over and grabbed the bags, then placed them on the couch. He dumped the first one out on the coffee table. "So I did this."
Holly gasped as fifty candy bars hit the table and spilled over the edges and onto the floor.
"Eli, what in the world—"
"I know how much you love these things. You're always eating them, and you had an endless stash in my fridge. I'm just sorry it couldn't be something better."
She gaped at him. "Eli, you didn't—"
He held up a hand, then grabbed the other bag and pulled out a container of strawberries and handed them to her. "And I know how much you love strawberries, too." He waved a hand. "Fuck, this is so pathetic."
Holly stared down at the box with a bewildered look on her face as he handed her the bag. "There's a little more. The last of it. I should have wrapped them, but all I could think of was getting over here as fast as I could."
She set the box of strawberries down on the coffee table and opened the bag. She pulled out a tiny shirt with a Kingsnakes logo on the front, and "Donnelley 52" emblazoned on the back.
"I figured the kid should have a t-shirt with their old man's name and number on it, right?" He nodded at the bag. "There's one more thing in there."
She glanced down at the bag, then took out a baby bib with a bunny on the front that read, "My Daddy Loves Me."
Holly lifted her tear-filled gaze to his face. "Eli?"
"I'm so fucking sorry," he blurted. "You don't know how much, Holly. I shut you out because I was terrified at the thought of being a father. I spent the past three weeks totally fucked up, Wilkes. Fucked up because I was scared I wouldn't know how to be a good father because I never had one."
He closed his eyes, giving his head a quick shake. "You should hate me. You should hate me for letting you think that you were all alone in this. I wouldn't blame you if you did. But I needed to wrap my head around everything. You need to know I'm in this one hundred percent, and I have no doubts. Not anymore."
"I thought you hated me," she told him, wiping her eyes. "I thought I didn't have any choice but to move on."
"That was my fault."
"I'm not blameless, either. I didn't mean to hide so many things from you. I guess I'm just used to handling things alone." She put a hand on her still flat stomach, then looked away. "I'm not sorry that I didn't tell you about the pregnancy before the series was over, though. I didn't want you focused on me when you needed to be focused on winning a Cup. I couldn't live with myself if I screwed that up for you."
"I know your intentions were good," he said, taking her hands. "But Wilkes, you can't move to California."
Holly sighed. "It's not that simple. I still need a job, Eli."
"True, but right now, staying as healthy as you can to deliver our child safely is your most important job. We can figure out everything else after that. We can figure it outtogether. But you can't leave. You're my family, Holly. You, me, this baby, and that little fuzzball over there on the cat bed. We're a family. You're all mine, and I need you here with me."
Holly bowed her head, staying that way for so long that he began to worry. When she finally met his gaze, her eyes shone with unshed tears, but a smile played around her lips. "Is this just another one of your lines to get your way, Donnelley?"