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“I told you to stay away from her. But since you won’t might as well do it proper,” he grunts.
“It’s not my fault!” I object. “Blue keeps sneaking into her boys’ room.”
We walk toward the barn, leading Prince, who stares wistfully after Arden’s retreating form.
Me and you both horse. Me and you both.
Chapter Ten
“So after you get the horse brushed and cleaned up, the next step is to tack him up,” I explain patiently to Theo. We’re all standing in the quiet barn, both horses standing between the crossties, patiently flicking their tails to ward away flies. He listens intently and does every single thing I ask of him, mimicking my motions.
Before the lesson, I chose two of our most bombproof horses. I selected Mouse, named for his small but fast nature, for Dylan, while I entrusted Tuscaloosa with Theo. He’s the only horse I know will keep that boy safe, regardless of what happens. Theo can do everything wrong and my gelding will stand there like the gentleman he is. Fucking love this horse. I trail my hand over his rump, tracing the big circles that mark him as an Appaloosa.
The boys chat excitedly with one another across the aisle. They disappear into the tack room, both returning with well-worn saddles in their arms. The tough leather shines under the barn lights. Theo grunts, using his arms to raise the saddle, but he’s nowhere near close. Reaching forward, I help him lift the heavy saddle onto Tuscaloosa’s back before showing him how to safely grab and buckle the cinch. We make quick work of saddling the horses, and it’s finally time to take them out and teach Theo how to mount up. “Lead us out, Dyl. You can take Mouse right to the ring.”
The horse's hooves clatter on the cement floor as he disappears through the sun-filled doorway. Arden smiles cheerfully at me before following him out. Unsnapping the ties, I swiftly bridle Tuscaloosa and offer the reins to Theo.
“Here you go Buddy, just hold these, and he’ll follow you right out,” I say, waving him forward. But his face falls, all the earlier excitement suddenly replaced by despair. “What’s wrong, Theo?”
He takes a moment, staring at his shoes, and although we have to get out to Dylan, my gut clenches, knowing this is more important. Pressing him right now might make him afraid, so I wait by his side silently. Tuscaloosa gives a little snort, reaching his nose forward to sniff Theo’s hair. It seems like forever, but in reality, it’s probably only a minute before Theo speaks.
His voice is faint but filled with determination. “So, you know this is my first time riding, right?”
“Yeah, it’s going to be okay, though. Tuscaloosa won’t let you fall. And I can stick close,” I promise, needing to assure him I won’t let anything bad happen.
“It’s not that,” his little jaw clenches. “It’s just… I might make a mistake… and you can’t punish my Mom. If you don’t promise you’ll only punish me, then I don’t want to ride.”
“What do you mean?” I ask, dread slithering up my spine.
“Just don’t hit my Mom for my mistakes, okay? She doesn’t have any more black and blues… I know my dad said they were her fault, not mine…” he trails off, bringing his thumb to his mouth to chew on the nail. The move is so reminiscent of Arden that it makes me want to scoop them both up and keep them away from the world.
His words paint a picture that has my pulse pounding in my temples. My blood boils with rage, and the urge to hit something erupts within me. What the actual fuck. Clenching and unclenching my hands, I push back my reaction, praying my voice won’t give it away. It’s clear they’ve been through some shit. But the thought of anyone using their fists on Arden makes me want to commit murder. In this moment, the next thing out of my mouth needs to be just right, and I take a few deep breaths.
“Neither of you is going to get punished for mistakes. If you make a mistake, we can work together and learn from it. They are natural and necessary to learn,” I say, keeping my tone even.
“Promise?” he questions, his voice filled with hope while still skeptical.
“There is absolutely nothing that you or your mom could ever do that would make me lay hands on either of you,” I swear with every fiber of my being. Theo stares at me for a few more seconds, weighing both my words and sincerity. His deep blue eyes filled with the heaviness of experiencing things no kid ever should.
Apparently, he approves of what he sees because he jumps forward, dropping the reins to the ground and throwing his arms around me. He squeezes me with such force that it’s like he wants to hold on and never let go.
And I never want to either.
Tuscaloosa stomps, bored, and Theo pulls away, but not before I see him wipe a tear from his cheek with the back of his hand.
“Let’s do this,” he says with a watery smile.
And I follow him out into the sunny day.
I’ll follow them anywhere.
Chapter Eleven
“Mommmmm … are we going in or what? I’m hungry,” Theo whines next to me, and I know he’s right. The evening air is starting to chill, and we’ve been standing on the Lyons's doorstep for way too long. Embarrassingly long.
But inside that house is a happy—normal—family. With six, six enormous adult sons. And the worst part is I used to love crowded family gatherings. All the love and happiness, but now they just remind me of all the things that could go wrong. All the mistakes I could make that would embarrass my husband.
Add in Theo, and the possibilities have me wanting to jump out of my skin.
