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I turn my head sideways to find the tip, and I swear it bounces off his knee as he moves. If that’s what he’s like flaccid, he’s a goddamn murder weapon hard.
I never met one in real life and now that this unicorn is in front of me, I can’t look away. I can’t help but think how I’ve always wanted to try one of those—a show-er.
I almost whine in grief at the disappearance of the star of the show. A wet Remi turns, facing away from me. If his front was impressive, his back is fucking mouth-watering. The muscles of his shoulders undulate with his movements. They taper tauntingly down to a narrow waste and the juiciest ass I’ve ever seen on a man. I can only imagine the nail marks I’d leave on those luscious cheeks after I’ve sucked him off properly.
My knees knock together, and I almost fall further into the room.
What are you doing? Grab what you need and get the hell out of here before he notices you’re a creeper, risk level: one thousand.
I squat-tiptoe in like some crouching-tiger-hidden-dragon ninja shit. I mean to keep my sight on the tiled floor. My eyelids, however, have a mind of their own as they flit up to catch the majestic waterfall pouring from the tip of the manny’s long member. Cotton stuffs my mouth, and I’m suddenly greedy for hydration.
Facing me fully, Remi rinses off, completely oblivious that my eyes are firmly focused on the thing dangling in front of my sight—a juicy carrot in a starving rabbit race.
And propriety be damned because I'm gunning for first place. I lick my lips because victory will be sweet…and a little salty.
“Shit.” Remi shoves his hands in front of him and clears his throat.
The sound breaks me out of the penis-induced trance and throws me right into mortification. My robe gets caught around my feet, and I fall forward with a yipe. I face-plant onto the floor while my ass stays high in the air, like a public offering. With my lids squeezed tight, I shift upright but keep patting the floor, like I lost a contact lens instead of my goddamn mind.
“Um, don’t mind me. I didn’t see anything.” Throwing my hand over my eyes, I reach around feeling for the cabinet door. “Nope, nothing dangling at all. Not even your knees. No, sir. For all I know, you could be washing up with an elephant trunk in there.”
Shut up, woman.
When my fingers trace the corner of the cabinet, I find the nob and swing it open in one jerky movement, which sends the thing careening into my nose. “Fuck.”
The hand that was covering my eyes goes to my nose, and I know it’s bleeding. Liquid drips onto my lips and as soon as I taste copper, everything goes black.
There is an irritable patting on my cheek. I try to brush it away, but it doesn’t stop.
“Queeny, come on. Wake up.”
More pat-pat-patting.
I groan.
“That’s it. Come back, Queeny.”
Isabel’s fever. Looking for Tylenol.
Finding a naked man instead.
Staring. Getting caught.
Crap, it’s the show-er.
I can’t. I can’t do it. I won’t. “No, leave me be.”
“I can’t, babe. I need to look at your nose. I don’t want you to bleed out on me.”
“It’s too late. I’m already dead.” I throw my arm over my eyes, adding to the cinematic drama that is my life. “The sight of your wooly mammoth tusk killed me.”
I feel rather than hear his deep chuckle in his chest. That’s when I realize he’s cradling me against him. The only thing I want to do is grind on his lap to see if he’s still naked. Because if he is, well, that’s an invitation I’ll RSVP to.
“Well, at least I know you’re okay. Come on, up you go.”
He lifts me under my arms like he does Isabel. Like I weigh nothing when I damn well know I’m not the lightest by any stretch of the imagination. Setting me on the toilet, Remi brushes my hair back as he tips my head. I can’t bear to look at him, especially if he’s still naked.
“You can open your eyes now. I’m … covered.” I swear I hear the snicker in his tone.
