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How easily I came…
My hand wrapped around my cock, anger crackling up my spine as I stroked myself, pissed at myself. Pissed at her.
That was never supposed to happen. Raven wasn’t even supposed to be here. She drove me crazy. She wasn’t supposed to be anything more than a girl who happened to be at the same pub that one night. But somehow this girl had become part of my journey… my life.
Tonight was a mistake. As though she changed everything with a moan, coming on my mouth. As if she marked me.
I didn’t even want to admit this to myself, but this was the first time—ever—I had come just from eating pussy. I had the stamina and control to pleasure and fuck for hours. After I lost Kek and Lucas, I couldn’t seem to get off, and when I did, it definitely wasn’t easy. That’s why I ventured to so many brothels, needing so many people… but still struggled.
Tonight, I had orgasmed effortlessly—and so hard that I lost consciousness for a moment.
Since she had joined me on this journey, I had released without difficulty down the prostitute’s throat—when I imaginedher. Tonight, I was so turned on, so in tune with her, I came when she did, as if I could feel her orgasm as well as my own.
“No.” I leaned into the tile wall, forcing myself to think of Kek and Lucas. They were the ones I loved. Who I missed.
Not. Her.
My heart started thumping, feeling no spark as I put them in the shower with me, pretending it was them getting me off, trying to recall Lucas’s dick inside me, Kek’s mouth around my cock.
Teeth clenching, I stoked harder, demanding I get off to them.
But my climax faltered, staying level, needing release but not letting me have it, like so many times before.
“No!” I hit the wall. “Fucking come,” I demanded my body, yet nothing triggered me, no matter how much I evoked Kek and Lucas.
My mind went where it needed without letting me have a say. The picture of Raven spreading her legs, her hair tumbling over her breasts, the feel of her tongue wrapping around the head of my cock.
A groan bubbled out of me, imagining her taking me all the way in her throat, my fingers threading through her dark, silky hair. Her moaning around me as she took me deeper.
“Fuck. Fuck,” I hissed, my balls tightening, my hand aching as I rubbed harder. Then I pictured my tongue sliding through her pussy again, hearing her cry out, and my body jerked hard, ropes of my sperm painting the wall and gushing over my hand. A loud moan came from me as I emptied myself.
Catching my breath, my mind cleared, and everything hit me. A truth crushing me from the inside out. My frame sagged, falling back into the tub, the water spraying down on me. I curled over myself and broke apart, a sob hitching in my lungs.
Ruthless emotion flooded out of me in harsh swells, tearing across my chest and heaving from my soul. The pain was so severe I couldn’t catch my breath.
Because I knew deep down…
I was starting to move on from Kek and Lucas. Loving them differently than I had.
And I was not okay with that.
The morning brought the haze of sun, but darkness hovered over Raven and me as we walked back to the old part of town. We had barely spoken more than a few words to each other since last night.
While she showered after me, I had run out to get food, which she barely touched, saying she wasn’t hungry. She curled up on the bed, her back to me, and pretended to sleep.
We needed to talk, but my mouth wouldn’t form the words, lost in my own angry, resentful, and muddled thoughts.
I contemplated leaving, giving her half the money for a journey home, and walking out, ending this torture for us before it was too late. But I couldn’t get myself to do it, finding every reason to stay. I mean, the Russian Mafia was after her. And now that I understood why they were, she was not safe. Putting her on a train alone? She’d be dead by the time it hit the border.
With their threat on my mind, I was on high alert, slipping us through alleys, trying to stay off main roads on our way back to old town. We weren’t the only ones. People clogged the lanes, bustling with a strange energy, shuffling forward in a wave as if everyone in town woke up at the same time and headed for the plaza.
“What’s going on?” Raven muttered against me, her brows quirked, peering around at the hordes of civilians moving together toward the center.
I shrugged, having no clue. “Is it Christmas today? Some holiday gathering?”
“Oh, I think it is.” Raven’s brow knitted, an edge of sadness to her voice. Probably realizing she was here with me and not home with her family. That her gift this year was me eating out her pussy for Christmas Eve.
A noise caught in my throat, my cock responding instantly to the memory and the need to do it again. I shoved the thought from my mind as soon as it popped in, but an itch already drove over my body. The craving for her taste overpowered any yearning for drugs.
