AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“And how did you act?” Sarfaraz demands. He crosses his arms over his chest. “How did you act that you’re so worried now?”
Tears wet my lashes. “That is not fair,” I seethe. I press my finger to my chest. “I’m not the one who knew that I was his brother’s fiancée and still kissed me anyway.”
Sarfaraz grimaces. “As I recall it, you were the one who kissed me.”
“You still kissed me back, knowing who I was!” I toss back. “I may be in the wrong here, but you are way wronger than I am. You knew what we’d have to deal with once we saw each other again. I had no idea. I was blindsided while you had time to prepare yourself.”
He pinches the bridge of his nose. I want to smack his hand away. He’s not the one who gets to be frustrated. I’m the one who opened up to him about my feelings and my insecurities and hopes and fears while he was keeping this huge thing from me. I thought I was getting emotional vulnerability from him, too. Now he knows all these deeply personal things about me that even my fiancé—his brother—doesn’t know. I was fine with Sarfaraz knowing all that stuff before because I assumed I’d never see him again. But now I have to see him at family functions, birthday parties, holidays.
It feels like the time we spent together has been tainted. I was open and honest. He deliberately withheld information that definitely would have stopped me from kissing him and thinking it was a big romantic gesture I’d keep secret for the rest of my life and only think about on my deathbed.
I shake my head free of the thoughts. “Do we tell Imtiaz?”
He freezes. “Tell him what?”
I clench my jaw. “About the kiss.”
“Were you planning on telling him before?”
“No,” I admit. “But that was before, when I thought you were a stranger and not one of my future in-laws.”
“Look, telling him wouldn’t do anyone any good,” he points out. “What happened this morning was—” he sucks in a breath “—something that won’t happen again, and something that was irrelevant. It’s useless to waste time thinking about it anymore.”
Even though anger at him flushes my skin, his words still twist in my gut. “Okay, then.”
“Okay. Besides, it’s not like we’ll be seeing much of each other after the wedding, anyway.”
My breath hitches. “Why not?”
“I’m only getting a pass to be here because it’s Imtiaz’s wedding,” Sarfaraz explains. “Our dad is not happy that I’m here, but he won’t say anything more on it because it’s a big enough event for this to be Imtiaz’s call. But after that...” He huffs. “I don’t know if Imtiaz has the bravery to keep fighting against Dad.”
I should hold on to my anger, but after letting him keep his secrets, this, at least, is something I deserve to hear. “What happened between you guys, anyway?” I explain. “I mean, your dad gave us the rundown, but what happened?”
Sarfaraz sighs, then takes a seat on the dusty roof. I slink down, too. “I knew going into law school that I didn’t want to do corporate law. The last thing I wanted to do was be Mr. Porter’s son at his office, and I didn’t want to succeed him in his company because it wouldn’t have been something I earned on my own merit. I could have been the worst corporate lawyer at the firm, but he still would have made me managing partner.” He shrugs. “It wasn’t something I wanted. I know you think of me mostly as a divorce lawyer, but it’s just part of why I went into family law. I want to help families—whether that’s keeping them together, helping them figure out a path apart, or working something out that makes everyone happy. As a Pakistani, I know how important family is. It’s something I’ve always loved about our culture and it’s why I wanted to help others.”
It makes sense; it explains why he said divorces can be helpful for families, and why he enjoys what he does so much, even though family law can get pretty dark. “So, you thought your best course of action was to lie to him about what you were studying and hope desperately he wouldn’t find out the truth until after you graduated?” I ask, disbelief widening my eyes.
“I’m not saying it was a good idea, and I’m not saying I’m proud of it,” he clarifies gruffly. “But I didn’t know what else to do. I felt so...suffocated by the pressure he put on me.” He picks at a loose button on his kameez. “I didn’t let him put any of it on Imtiaz, because I knew how crushing it was and I didn’t want him going through the same thing. But I couldn’t think of anything else to do. I was desperate, and I needed an escape.”
“That sounds intense. What ended up happening?”
“Dad obviously found out when I graduated. He called me no son of his and forbade anyone else from having contact with me.” Sarfaraz tries to speak casually, but I see the hurt brimming in his eyes. “I’ve kept in secret contact with Imtiaz, meeting with him every now and then. I was the one who encouraged him to pursue biology, which is what he wanted. I knew it was going to disappoint Dad that he didn’t want to do law, but I told him it was his life and he needed to do what made him happy.”
I stare up at Sarfaraz and, briefly, sympathy washes over me. “I hate that you felt so trapped that you had to lie about what you really wanted to do. I can’t imagine how that must have felt.”
He raises a brow. “Don’t you? I assumed you know exactly how that feels.”
“What do you mean?”
“Maya, you basically told me you got engaged because you wanted to escape the pressure your mom was putting on you,” he states plainly, and the words cut deeper than they should. “You wanted to be treated like the adult you actually are, and you couldn’t see any other way to do it than to get married.”
“That’s not true,” I blurt, though the words sound fake.
“Try looking at yourself in the mirror and say those words again. You’ll see how ridiculous you look.”
Anger rushes to my throat. “I’m not having this conversation,” I seethe. I rise to my feet. “I just wanted to talk to you to make sure we’re on the same page, and that we’re saying nothing. If you keep your mouth shut, so will I.”
I don’t wait for a response. I head for the stairs, go back to my room, and pray that I make it through the next two days.
