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“Jesus,” I whisper, catching just the very edge of her dark pink nipple as her robe opens.
“Are you having second thoughts?” she demands, her hands working to close her robe as if she feels like she has to shore herself up against me.
“I don’t think this is how this should happen,” I manage after swallowing several times.
“This?” she says, her voice a little weaker than before. “What do you mean this?”
“I think you’ll regret losing your virginity this way.”
I give her a sad smile, wanting to reach out to her and place a calming hand on her arm, but I’m naked and she’s naked under that robe. I swear skin-to-skin contact right now would have me backpedaling so fast I’d trip and crack my head open.
“Virginity?” Her nose twitches right before a cackle escapes her perfect lips. “You think I’m a virgin?”
“You’re not?”
“Cash, I’m almost twenty-nine. I lost my virginity in high school.”
Something akin to a white-hot poker needles through my chest.
“With who?” I growl.
There wasn’t a guy who was worthy of her at the high school. I knew every single one of those little shits. Not to mention, they were all warned to stay the fuck away from her, not only by me but also her twin brothers.
“It doesn’t matter,” she says, her fist clenching her robe even tighter. “Are we doing this or not?”
It’s rare that Adalynn gets defensive, but I know when she does, she’s close to giving up.
“Yeah, Ads. We’re doing this,” I say against my better judgment.
We’re supposed to stay friends. We’re supposed to go back to normal after this is said and done, but I don’t know how that’s possible.
“Can you hand me the remote?” she asks, pointing to the bedside table.
I oblige, grabbing that stupid bottle of lube as well.
Just as I get the bottle open, pulling the seal off, and the top screwed back on, she presses a button that casts the room in darkness, leaving only hints of light in the room from her en suite.
I want to complain because I can’t see shit, but I have to remind myself that this is for her, not me. Despite the way I feel and the tightness in my chest, it hasn’t made my dick flag at all. I know there should be some shame in that, but I can’t seem to feel any of it right now.
I slather my cock with pH balanced fucking lube because I’m sure there would be a rule about running my lubed slick fingers over her slit. As annoyed as it makes me, I don’t want her to feel violated in any way.
“Jesus,” I mutter, unable to even think shit like that without my cock flexing in my hand.
“Is something wrong.”
So many things, baby.
“No, just… prepping.”
“Are you having a hard time getting… ready? You can watch some dirty videos if you need to.”
Fuck me sideways. How can she possibly think that I’d need something like that? She’s practically naked. When I pull back the covers, she easily spreads her legs so I can settle in between them.
“I’m good,” I assure her. “Do you want to guide me or do you want me to do it?”
“I umm… I think you should do it.”
“Lift this leg,” I tell her, patting the leg to my left since my left hand is the one not covered in lube.
