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“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” Doug groaned. “It’s not a crime to deny someone’s application for a pet. She’s unfit, and she isn’t getting a dog.”
I started to huff, and River’s hand found mine, squeezing just enough to remind me to keep quiet.
“Let me tell you why you’re wrong, Doug,” he said, his voice sexy and gruff as he squared his shoulders. “It is unlawful to deny a woman’s application for a pet just because she broke your heart.”
“How about she married my brother? Does that seem lawful to you?”
“Listen, I understand why you’re angry with her. I really do. But the woman wants to adopt a dog, and she’ll provide a good home, so she should be allowed to do so.” River paused, and his shoulders relaxed. “Come on, dude. You’ve punished her for twenty-five years. Let’s call a truce.”
“What the fuck is in it for you?” Doug crossed his arms over his chest.
“I’ll tell you, man-to-man, what’s in it for me. You see this gorgeous woman beside me?”
Doug peered around River’s shoulder and looked at me. “Yes.”
“Well, she hates me most of the time, and I’ve only got her here for three more weeks, and she’s agreed to go home with me tonight if you give Midge the dog. So, basically, Doug, I’m not leaving here without that fucking dog. I can make things very uncomfortable for you. You’ve got plenty of violations going on outside this building, with extension cords running across the sidewalk and duct tape on the windows. I’d hate to bring the city down here to check that out.”
“Damn. You’ve clearly got it bad, and you’re willing to fuck me over if I don’t do what you want. All for a woman?” Doug said, shaking his head with disgust.
“We seem to understand one another,” was all River said.
“So, if I give Midge the dog, you leave, and we don’t have a problem?”
“That’s the deal.” River glanced over his shoulder and winked at me.
Too smooth for his own good.
“Fine. Let’s make it quick.”
“She’s actually here. I’ll text her to come inside and take a look at the dogs,” I said, typing out a message to Midge.
“I’m assuming you don’t want to see her?” River said.
“Oh, I’m definitely going to see her. I go to the Golden Goose once a week just to glare at her.”
River barked out a laugh. “This ought to be interesting.”
Midge came walking through the door with a wicked grin on her face like she’d just won some big feat. She looked between the three of us, and her gaze landed on Doug’s. “Hello, asshole.”
“Hello, home-wrecker,” Doug said.
“You sure like to bring up my faults, but you fail to mention that you slept with my best friend before things started with your brother,” she hissed.
I wished I had a bucket of popcorn because this was like watching reality TV at its finest.
“I’ve told you many times that I never slept with Rhonda!” He was shouting now.
“Oh, I just caught you in her bed for a sleepover?” She moved closer to him and pointed her finger in his face. “Payback is a bitch, Dougy boy. Now, take me to see the dogs.”
“Family is off-limits, and you know that,” he grumped.
“You don’t even like him!” she shouted.
“Yeah, because he married my goddamn wife,” Doug hissed.
“Listen,” River said, pinching the bridge of his nose. “As riveting as this conversation is, I’ve got things to do. Can you continue this after she gets the dog, please?”
“That’s fine with me.” Midge shrugged. “We could discuss it further over coffee if you’d like.”
