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“Secret’s safe with me.” I smile and wrap my pinky finger around hers.
“It’s about Jax.”
“I figured as much. Delanie said he also skipped out on family game night, which was a bust by the way. It wasn’t the same. But I wondered if he was off to the same party you were going to."
“Well, you'd be right. And it was kind of a disaster." I bring my knees up so that I can rest my elbows on them.
“What happened?”
I think about how much I want to tell her without going into any of the super private details, things I might want to hold close to my chest for a while. Details I don't think I'm ready to tell anyone.
“I guess it just isn’t the same, like you had mentioned. And I think he was expecting for us to reconnect like there was no time passed. And the truth is, Mama, when he left all those years ago, it really hurt.”
“Oh, my girl.” My mom guides my head down to her shoulder as we sit side by side, and she runs her fingers over my hair. "I knew you had a crush on him. Do you think that him leaving could have triggered the-”
I nod, cutting her off because I don’t want her to finish that sentence. I never really went into details with my parents about that time. Because I had to do whatever I could to forget him. But yes, that day was kind of the start of it all.
I knew I wasn’t good at hiding it. But how did everyone else see it andhedidn’t?
“The only thing I can tell you, my love…what's that thing your dad always says?Con Corazón, no-”
“Piensa con el Corazón, no con la mente.” I help her. Daddy would always say it to me growing up. I never knew what it meant until high school, because it was one of those things he'd say I didn't need a translation on. But when I asked him one day what it meant, every time he had ever said it to me had clicked into place. Like a tectonic shift in the ground, pulling together like puzzle pieces.
My dad was born in Mexico. My mom was born and raised here in Texas. And because both of my parents speak English, that is my first language. Though Daddy never let the beauty of Spanish escape us, teaching me words and phrases over the years.
“Yeah, that.Think with your heart, not with your mind. You are past that part in your life and all you can do now is spring for a second chance, at your own pace of course. And only if it’s what you want." My mom reels me back in.
“It’s easier said than done.” I sigh a breath of defeat. Not really because I feel defeated but because this situation is only going to get more complicated, and I don't know if I have the time to mentally prepare myself for what that's going to mean for me.
“I believe in you.” My mom leans in and presses a kiss to my forehead before standing up and heading back up the stairs. “Also, pick up your shoes. That’s not where they go.”
I roll my eyes. “Goodnight to you too, Mom.”
She chuckles before disappearing into the hallway.
Where the fuck did you go last night?
I text Jaelynn. My headache still pounds like someone beat me with a boulder, even though I hardly drank anything last night. But waking up and realizing that last night was not a dream causes my brain to hurt.
When I walked away from Jax in the bathroom, my first thought was to act aloof. Because at this point, we don’t know each other like we used to but I knew that after seeing him drown himself in beer at the bar, that it wasn't going to be that easy to pull off. Because curiosity pulled me to him, like it always did. I wanted to know why he was sucking down beer so fast and then chasing it with more beer. I wanted to know if he's become the type of guy who enjoys drinking at the bar, or if he watches sports on the weekends or has any hobbies. Not to mention the leather he was decked in and the tattoos that I saw peeking out of his clothes.
Bitch, I had things to do.
Jae’s text pulls me away from my thoughts and thank goodness because it would be an endless pit of all things Jax if I had continued to ponder.
You mean A thing?
Yeah, a handsome thing.
I giggle at her admission. Classic Jae.
You missed the drama.
I text her.
Thank God. What happened?
Jaxon Monroe happened.
