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“Doing what?” I play dumb.
She actually reaches for my hand and holds it briefly. “For being brave when he couldn’t.”
I know I saved him in a tough spot.
“He has a girlfriend. He’s in love with her and being picked… and then having it filmed on live TV.” She shakes her head. “I would bet money that it’s him.”
“How do you know?” I whisper under my breath.
She shakes her head then leans on my shoulder. She knows she’s not supposed to get close to me or try to seduce me. She knows she’s supposed to play with the cameras, flirt with them instead of us. And she does just that. She laughs and touches my mask then puts the bow back on my clown head. “Because I’ve been a fan of both groups since both debut, and I protect my idols at all costs. So thank you.”
I’m in shock.
I’ve never heard anyone outside our circle speak this way. And to know that a fan feels so protective is humbling.
Stunned I almost stop walking, then whisper my own truth, suddenly comfortable in front of a complete stranger, knowing somehow I can implicitly trust her. “If I wasn’t already in love with someone I think you’d make me fall.”
She stumbles.
I catch her.
And when she looks up at me she nods. “I’ll protect you too, Sookie,” She loops her arm in mine. “And the girl you love.”
“I think,” I smile down at her. “We just became best friends.”
“You know,” She shrugs as she gets into the van, the cameras are following us all but not closely. “You may be my new bias.”
I burst out laughing and hold up my hand for a high five. She jumps into my arms instead and leans into my neck. “Give them something to watch, then go back to her, take the focus off of your cursing.”
I spin her around and set her down, all before she turns toward the cameras and says. “I already know who my idol is for the day, does that mean I win prize money and we get to go first?”
Producer Lee is looking down at his phone eyes wide, he elbows Director Simon, who then elbows Ari, who won’t even look my way. Her face is tense, and I can’t tell what she’s thinking, but I do know that she’s been watching my interaction with Dueri. I know if the tables were turned I wouldn’t be too happy.
I turn my attention back to Simon and the producers who are staring at their phones like a miracle just happened.
Lucas joins them, stares at the phone then shows Grace, her eyes widen, but I can tell she’s sad as she steps up in front of the camera. “It looks like we have our first contenders for the challenge, and yes if you’ve guessed the correct identity of your idol you’ll be the first ones to get prize money.”
Dueri looks up at me, her eyes soft. “It’s Sookie.”
“And how do you know?” Lucas steps forward in full on protective mode, then again we both know at this point everyone’s going to know I cussed and that my image will be tarnished, but Dueri surprises me again when she slowly pulls off my clown mask lowering it from my face and answers.
“Because of his heart.”
Gasps are heard on set.
The rest of the guys paired up with girls are just standing there staring at us so I play into it the way I’ve always been told and the way I’m hoping this number one fan understands and say. “Being an idol is hard sometimes, but what makes it the best is when your fans know your heart the way she knows mine.”
I swear one of the makeup artists looks ready to pass out.
Director Simon grins so big you’d think his face was about to crack, but when I look back at Ari all I see is pain.
And fuck. It hurts me to know that I just did this to her. but…
There is such a long list of buts that I could interject here, I’m just too tired to do it. I’m sorry I hurt her—she’s the last woman… the last person in the world I want to hurt, but… this is my life. This is the life—the contract—she approved me to sign.
And when I lock eyes with Lucas, it’s like he knows I may have just ended my own career.
I should have probably, stayed silent and kept on the bow, at least that’s what I tell myself until I get into the van and sit next to the guy in the mask and feel a tap on my thigh before he grips my hand.
