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I couldn’t recall what the headmistress, Thea, had called the room I stood in now. Back in Providence, it would be called the ballroom. In Goth Mor Helle, which tried to mirror the ways of high society but failed—it was too “other” and ancient—I had a feeling the room would be more of a banquet hall.
Currently, the cavernous room with two walls of windows, marble floors, and four chandeliers on the ceiling was being transformed into a magical, indoor winter garden.
The north wing’s traffic flowed with Ongahri towing benches, chairs, decorations, and tables, readying the room for tomorrow’s grand celebration, my marriage to Lysander.
It was late afternoon, and after my ride with Lucius, I’d spent most of the day exploring. The queen had all the arrangements made for tomorrow’s event, leaving me with nothing to do but think and watch everyone pass me by.
“Sierra? Do you have a moment?”
I turned around and saw Lysander standing in front of a group of Ongahri who were carrying massive floral arrangements of winter irises and white holly.
“Of course,” I said.
After Lucius and I had caught up to him and Cornelius, riding out to meet them as they were coming back, the four of us had ridden to the stables. Lysander had apologized, not only for last night’s behavior but also for leaving me behind to ride alone with the leader of House Dega. He’d asked what Lucius and I had talked about, while I tried to pretend that absolutely nothing was any different between us. He had been warm and attentive, almost comically so, asking my opinions on trivial things and whether or not I had named my horse yet.
I still had no idea what I was going to do about him, if anything. I was simply going through the motions and letting my feet decide my actions, following along with wherever they led me.
We walked down the hall as people paused long enough to bow and greet us as we passed them by. Lysander walked briskly and I tried to catch up. He opened a door into a small room I’d never seen, hurriedly closed the door behind us, and led us through yet another door to a tiny outside space that was more alcove than garden.
We had lost my guard, and when I mentioned that to him, he waved a hand dismissively.
“They know you’re with me.” He motioned to a bench at the end of the short path. Tall conifers enclosed us. I could hear sounds from the kitchens nearby.
“Mari has given us her blessing for the tour, so we shall leave after the ceremony,” he said. He was sitting beside me, our thighs touching. He took my hand and held it in both of his. His head was bowed, and I couldn’t see his face well enough to know what he might be thinking.
“Where will we go?” Did I still think I could do this?
“Last night I spoke of Iris Isle.” He looked at me, his eyes hopeful. “I think you’ll love it. The water there… well, it’s the color of your eyes. A very romantic place. And it has pineapple.” He grinned, but I didn’t find it sincere.
I wanted to pull my hand away, I wanted to put more space between us. I wanted to confront him. Instead, I said, “Are you certain this is what you want?”
He looked confused for a second but then his face cleared. “Absolutely. You’ll love it there. It’s neither cold nor hot. The sea air—”
“No, I mean this marriage, Lysander. Tomorrow. Me.”
His eyes widened just enough for me to wonder if he was afraid I knew. Knew about Cornelius, about him.
“Of course I am.” He flipped my hand palm-side up and laced his fingers through mine. “You are beautiful, smart, kind. Everything I could ask for. And you will make a wonderful wife.”
I stared at our interlaced hands. “I told you I wanted honesty,” I whispered.
When I looked back up at him, his head was bowed. “Honesty.” He met my gaze then. “I can tell you that I am fully committed to taking you as my wife. I’m fully committed to getting to know you.”
“Is that all?”
He smiled sadly. “Is that not enough?”
He wasn’t going to tell me. I couldn’t blame him, really. His life, his reputation was at stake, the pressure he must be under excruciating. I decided then and there that I wouldn’t press. I wouldn’t add to that pressure. It would be cruel. If he was willing to try to make this marriage work, and I believed that he was, and Cornelius would go home, back to Ordelpho, then maybe things could change. There would be friendship, at least. And maybe one day, he’d trust me enough to tell me the truth.
It wasn’t like I had no secrets, either. I came to this marriage unclean, having given my maidenhead to another, a Servant of the Owl, for the gods’ sakes, which, although not a criminal offense, wasn’t appropriate either. Not for a Fealty Bride.
“It is enough,” I said, meaning it.
His amber gaze searched mine, and his expression relaxed. “Mari has sent some men down to ready the ship for us. It’s not as grand as the one we’ll board once we get to Port Atticus, but it’s not shabby either. You won’t have to do a thing. Once we get to port, I’ll hire a maid for you to voyage with us, and the men I’ll hire will be professional seamen. And from there, we’ll head to the Isle.”
I swallowed, both excited about seeing the ocean for the first time, traveling to a faraway island, and nervous about being alone with him. By the sounds of it, he’d be the only alpha on the ship, which would take care of my fear of an early estrus in case the mysterious claiming takes time to complete. I wished now I had asked more questions of Orion. Perhaps I could after dinner.
The door from inside slammed and boots crunched on the path.
