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The night goes on without incident. No one is stabbed or shot. Nobody was meant to be armed but we all knew that was never going to happen.
I've lost count of how many drinks I’m on when Carmine walks over with two cigars. He hands me one after he chops it and I pull a lighter from my pocket as we both stand leaning against the glass railing avoiding the party.
“Your sister’s having fun,” I say as I watch Aria jump around her husband with her heels off. The music isn't loud enough and she's the only one dancing. Paulie has an expression of mild tolerance on his face.
Carm shakes his head, smiles a bit. “It's her first night out since Elliott was born. She's on one.”
“Poor Paulie,” I say watching her husband as she rags his arms around with way too much enthusiasm. He actually looks amused now though.
“Poor Paulie.” Carm agrees. He hits my arm and turns to me fully against the railing. “You never told me how your date ended up?”
“Fine.”
He raises his blonde brows. “That's all I get? Fine?”
I give him a flat look. “If you wanna gossip go sit with the women.” We actually love a bit of gossip usually but I don't want to share the details of mine and Casimira’s time with anyone. It's for me only.
“Fine. Be like that.” He lets out a sigh with a smile and turns leaning back on the railing to face the party again. “You know I slept with one of the dancers at Diamonds the other night.” My muscles go rigid and he turns his head towards me. “You know the redhead?” He says after a longer pause than needed. The corner of his lips twitches up when my posture relaxes. “All of those girls are crazy. I think it's a universal thing that strippers are absolute demons in the bedroom. They take cock like-”
“Watch yourself.” I snap, glaring at him.
His smirk turns into a full smug grin and he takes a large drink from his glass. “Benny owes me a grand.”
I roll my eyes. There isn't a single thing my brothers wouldn't bet on. “For what?”
“Told him I reckon you've got yourself head over heels for that girl, he disagreed.” He grins. “Oi! Benny boy!” He shouts over to where Benny is with a few of our men. “It's payday you fucker.” Benny makes a sullen face before ignoring him and continuing his conversation.
“Would you shut the fuck up?” I shake my head. He laughs and I push away from the railing disposing of my cigar and placing my glass on a table. “Where are you going?” He says with too much amusement.
“Away from you, you guido looking fuck.” I slap him on the shoulder hard enough to spill some of his drink and he laughs even harder.
It's nearly midnight when I spot Luca and Raff standing by some of the Murphy cousins. Luca has that look in his eyes like he's going to make my life a real problem tomorrow. He's prone to fucking women he shouldn't. The married ones, the engaged ones, the pregnant ones. He likes the challenge too much. I b-line for them, gripping them both by the shoulder and pulling them away. “I’m leaving and so are you. You can carry on with your night just not here and not around the Murphy's.” Raffs got zero chance of controlling Luca’s impulses and I have no interest in babysitting any of my brothers tonight, nor having to do damage control tomorrow morning because Luca dishonoured someone's wife or daughter.
Luca stares at me for a second gauging how serious I am. When he comes to the conclusion that he can't push me, he rolls his eyes. “You're ruining my fun.”
“Take Benny with you,” I call after him. He's been a little shit recently. Taking off from school with his friends, getting way too drunk and spending way too much money. He's constantly in the headlines, Luca and Raff are also constantly in the headlines but they know how to play the game. They're never caught out in compromising situations. Benny hasn't learned that yet, nor is he interested in learning. He doesn't get that as a family we have a pretty big image to live up to and the weight on his shoulders will unfortunately only get heavier.
Raff was already fifteen when I started taking care of them and my father had already screwed him up good and proper too. He witnessed what me and Luca had to do to secure the life we have today, unlike Benny and Francesca. I've tried to keep their childhoods for as long as possible, as much as I can in this world we live in. As a result, Benny has never had to work for anything in his life or make any hard decisions. He has no responsibilities. Partly my fault I know. I thought giving him more responsibility would help him see but, the more responsibility I give him the more he rebels.
17
Casimira
Present-day
Manhattan, New York City
I think my ego may be a little bruised. It’s been a week since Enzo took me out and I’ve heard nothing. I called him the next day, no answer. He never called me back. I toyed with myself for days, typing and retyping messages like a fool but couldn't make myself send any of them. I told myself, it’s because I’ve never chased a man and wasn't about to start now but really, my fear of rejection came out in full force. Thanks for that one Dad.
So I've been keeping myself busy. Putting in longer hours at the club, hitting the gym most days. I’ve been shopping more than ever, it's not having the same effect as usual. I’m just starting to feel restless again like I need to change something.
I sit on the floor in front of my full-length mirror finishing up my makeup for work. I pull my phone from the charger and Facetime Aleksy, propping it up against the mirror so I can plug my straighteners in. He always settles my brain when I'm feeling a bit off-kilter.
He's in his car and looks worse than ever. Every time I see him I get a little shock but today, I'm not sure I’ve ever seen him looking this rough. His cheeks are even more hollow than usual, dark black circles sit under his eyes and his hair hangs low over his brow. He looks like he hasn’t slept in days.
“Alright, Mush.” He croaks. He's been smoking too much lately.
“Aleksy, what's going on?” My voice comes out harder than I intended. I’m tired of dancing around the subject, it's clear he's not okay and I'm getting fed up with him constantly brushing it off.
