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Her face heated just thinking about it. How she’d sat on his lap on the porch and made out with him. How she’d practically thrown herself at him. And how he had carefully let her know that she was like a sister to him, not a wife.
That was probably the most embarrassing. How kind he was toward her. How he’d known exactly what she wanted, when she wanted it. And how she’d mistaken that for the kind of love that tilted her world, the kind she couldn’t have now that she craved it.
Tears flowed freely down her face as she unlocked her apartment door. Only the dingy walls in the tiny space greeted her. She walked into her bedroom and sat down on her bed. Her journal sat on the nightstand and she picked it up.
The warn leather cover, smooth with years of age, felt cool under her fingertips. She opened it and skimmed over the child-like handwriting.
I hate my father. He’s so mean. He promised he would take me to the zoo today, but he spent so long at work that he didn’t make it back in time. I had to stay at home and clean my room because grandmother made me. I’m so mad right now.
She flipped the page and read another entry.
Derek and I played checkers today. He totally cheated and I lost. What a jerk.
The rest of the entries she read were similar. A child complaining about everything that made her mad. It was a whole lot of whining.
She blinked, stunned. How had she never seen that before? Instead of writing the injustice of today in her journal, she stood, walked to the trash and tossed it in. She was done with her book of pain. Derek was right. She needed to let go of her anger. It hadn’t done her any good over the years.
She slipped off her shoes and crawled into her bed, hugging Larry to her chest. Why did she even bring that unicorn to New York? All it did was remind her of Derek. Everything reminded her of him, and how he was no longer in her life.
An emptiness filled her, and she moaned. Job hunting could happen another day. All she wanted to do was go back to sleep.
Chapter 30
Derek leaned back in his office chair; his eyes strained from staring at the computer screen for too long. He’d been working long hours since the day Nara had driven off in that stupid cab. Mr. Claymore had announced his plans to retire and turn the company over to Derek, and there had been a lot to do.
But, if he were being honest with himself, he was still at work at six o’clock on a Friday not because he had so much work, but because he didn’t want to go home to his empty house. The house that should have been his and Nara’s for the next two years.
He’d been such a coward the day she left. He should have told her how he felt. Brielle had been right all along. He was just too chicken to say the words. And now she was gone from his life once again.
Only this time it hurt so much worse, because he’d almost had her.
Maybe that was an exaggeration. He’d almost had her as his pretend wife for two years. But he didn’t blame her father for going back on his plan. He wanted to have a better relationship with his daughter, and from what Richard had said, things were better between them. At least she talked with him now on a regular basis.
Derek rubbed his eyes. He should go home. He just didn’t want to. Was it terrible that he hadn’t washed the pillowcase Nara had used? Was it creepy that he found he could still smell the scent of her on it, if he closed his eyes and breathed in deep?
His phone rang, the loud screeching sound of his ringtone. He made a mental note to change it. All it did was remind him of the time in the jacuzzi with Nara. He frowned and stabbed at the answer button.
“Hello?”
“Derek. I’m sorry to call on a Friday evening. I hope you didn’t have plans.”
“No. I’m actually still at work.”
“Oh. I’m glad I didn’t interrupt. I need to talk to you. I can’t get ahold of Nara.”
Alarm shot through him. What was wrong with Nara? Was she okay? He sat up in his chair. “What happened?”
“I called her on Monday, and she answered, but sounded really funny. Depressed, which isn’t like her at all. She told me something bad happened at work and now she was out of a job, and possibly a career.”
Derek pressed the phone to his ear, his heart working overtime. “Did she say what happened?”
Mr. Claymore sighed. “Yes. She said she found out her boss had been stealing designs from her over the last few years. I guess the one she entered in the contest was one of them. They disqualified her for plagiarism.”
Shock rang through him. “Plagiarism? What?”
“I know. It’s very upsetting, but when she told me, she just seemed kind of listless. I don’t know how to describe it other than that. It worried me, because she’s such a fighter. I thought maybe she’d snap out of it, get mad, and figure out how to get her designs back. But I’ve been calling over the last few days, and she hasn’t been answering.”
Derek stood, unable to sit in his chair any longer. He paced the room which was suddenly too hot. “You don’t think she’d do anything…rash…do you?”
