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Thane set her down on her feet and flipped the covers back on the bed. He ran his hand over the cool, clean black sheets. Perfect. In a smooth move, he stripped away the security of her blanket and tossed it aside before she could think to grab on to it. “Atticus entrusted you to me, sugar. Believe me, I take that as an honor, considering how you're revered in the club. I may be new as a member, but I'm not a rookie in the lifestyle.”
Connie flushed as he cupped her breast, skimming his thumb over a pert nipple. “I don't want to be submissive, Thane.”
She had the most wonderful skin, he mused. Soft, supple, responsive to even the lightest brush of his fingers. Slowly, he maneuvered her around so her back was to the bed. A gentle nudge toppled her on to it. “Unfortunately, that's the gift of a Switch.” He swung her legs up, made sure she was comfortable, then covered up that delightful body. “Opposing sides of the coin.”
Thane's steps were uneven as he rounded the bed, stopping briefly to gather the items Atticus had set out earlier. The Master had obviously had an anal scene in mind, he thought, lifting the butt plug and studying it with approval. When the covers shifted, he glanced at Connie, noting the sickly pallor and wide eyes. “You've never tried one of these?”
“Nothing goes near my ass,” she spat, then ducked under the duvet.
Oh, they could have so much fun together when she finally stopped denying a key part of herself. “We'll save these for later. I don't remember anal play being on your list of hard limits, sugar.” He ran them through his head, smiling. “Nope, no anal on the list Atticus gave me.” He carried the small pile over to a cupboard and dumped them inside, stripping off his shirt as he moved back to the bed.
She muttered something he didn't quite catch, and as he removed his pants and slid under the covers beside her, he asked her to repeat it. When she huffed and rolled onto her side away from him, he solved the problem by hooking his arm around her waist and hauling her back against him, warm skin to warm skin.
“What are you doing?”
“What I love doing more than anything else. Giving a nervous…” He rested his hand on her stomach, “Reluctant…” His chin settled into the sloping curve between her neck and shoulder, “Wary submissive some tender loving aftercare. Relax and enjoy it, Connie. I'm not asking for anything in return. You need to forge a bond with the one you submit to—I get that, and this is us bonding.”
“No funny business?”
“I am a perfect gentleman…unless requested to be otherwise.” He pressed his lips to her hair, smelling coconut as he breathed deep. He closed his eyes and worked on syncing his breathing with hers, slow and steady. He'd found that breathing in time with a sub could combat a myriad of trust issues, and as the minutes passed by in an almost easy silence, he felt Connie relax into him.
Mission accomplished.
“Thane?”
“Hmm.”
“The rest of the story isn't pretty. It's one of the lowest points of my life, and I don't like talking about it. Evan wasn't just sadistic, he was cruel. He used me as a urinal. Hacked off my hair with a carving knife and cut into my head, telling me he was going to scalp me when he was done.” Connie trembled viciously.
That explained the blood play and watersports limits, he thought in disgust. He hadn't expected her to open up this way, but he'd hoped the intimacy would at least loosen her tongue. Of the four limits she'd listed, he could live without three. He had no desire to treat anyone like a pet, or to be one himself. Watersports was a no, and blood play was an artform he couldn't grasp.
However, he'd be incredibly happy to practice on this Evan guy. With some blunt and serrated blades.
“Humiliation got him off. Watching me crawl around on hands and knees, those stupid fucking puppy dog ears stuck on my head and paw mittens on my hands. He wanted me to wear a tail, but I said no. Got smacked around for saying it, but I told him I had a recurring anal abscess, so he backed off. He wasn't one to get his hands dirty if he didn't need to. Bloody, yes, but dirty? No.”
The idiot wasn't a Dom in any sense of the word. Connie was quickly drawing a picture of a man riding a power trip. No morals, no conscience. No idea how the dynamic between a Dom and a submissive was supposed to be a partnership of give and take, trust and pleasure. The asshat was a deviant, nothing more.
“That night, he decided to teach me a lesson for refusing him. I don't know what he used, but he lubed me up with something caustic. I remember it starting to burn, I remember screaming. He hit me to shut me up, but it didn't stop me. Couldn't stop me. In retrospect, it saved my life. One of his neighbors came around to check if I was okay because of all the noise. He couldn't kill me then, which pissed him off. One witness was one witness too many to risk it.”
Thane tightened his hold on her, rubbing the chill from her skin as she shook in his arms. He wondered if any of the men in her life understood what a tremendous woman she was, how strong she was to endure something like that. He said nothing, afraid a word from him would halt her confession—she had no choice but to get this out before it devoured her.
“When the neighbor left, he had a tantrum. Threw things, broke things. I think he wanted to destroy me more than anything, but he took his rage out on the house. He liked the sound of delicate ornaments shattering against the wall, and my screams were dying. I believed I wasdying.” Her legs kicked restlessly. “He dragged me out to the car, naked, blindfolded, and doubled over in pain. Drove me to the hospital and literally kicked me out at the ER entrance. It was the last time I saw him—he disappeared not long after that, before I got out of the hospital. Just upped and vanished into the ether.”
She was trying valiantly not to cry, he realized. She was fighting to keep the tears out of her voice, which only resulted in the words sounding strangled. Her back was rigid, her muscles quivering with the effort to breathe slowly and not sob. The core of her was strong—it had to be to bear the weight of the pain she carried—but the rest of her was tired, too tired to keep herself from spinning apart.
“I have the utmost respect for a woman who can go through hell and still hold her head up high, Connie,” Thane murmured. Unlike her, he kept his voice low and easy, containing his rage away from her. “The submissive got hurt, badly, so you brought the Domme into play to stop that from happening again.” He rubbed slow circles over her abdomen, calming her ragged breathing. “Relax into me, sugar. Remember my cupped hands? Put yourself into them and trust that I'm not like him. Not one little bit. I don't want to take everything from you, sugar—I want to give you what you need.”
“You don't understand—”
“No, I don't. Not completely, but I'm beginning to.” Thane sighed and kissed her head. “Just trust me, Connie.”
When her hand rested on top of his on her stomach, her fingers linking through his, it was a small victory, but a victory, nonetheless.
***
Chapter Five
There was no rest for the wicked.
