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“You have my complete approval on the painkillers, Doc,” I said. “I’d rather feel nothing.”
He chuckled at me. “Well, they won’t be quite that strong, but as I said, they’ll keep the pain from debilitating you.”
“Well, if that’s what you’ve got, it’s what I’ll take.”
He shook a couple of pills onto a nearby flat stone, and used another stone to grind them up. I licked the powder up, and by the time I was finished, my tongue felt tinglingly numb. I really wanted a drink of water after that, but thinking about Alpha rules and my mom reminded me about her Alpha wound and the way Doc had treated her during her recovery.
I hadn’t thought about it very much since then because my mind had been set on getting to Bryn and Tavi, but now that I had Dr. Stan in front of me, I figured I might as well ask him about it now. I’d probably not have another chance.
“Doc,” I said, “are you and my mother close?”
He fumbled with the pills, almost dropping the bottle on the ground. “Wh-what makes you ask that, Alpha?”
I eyed him. “I noticed that you seemed particularly attentive when you were treating her Alpha wound. And when she woke up, she looked at you like…” I wasn’t sure how to complete the sentence. “Well, I’ve never seen her look at anyone quite like that.”
He hesitated, his hand still gripping the pill bottle.
“Don’t even consider lying to me, Doc,” I said. “I’ll know.”
He closed his eyes, let out a deep breath, and then he nodded. “Alright, I suppose it’s only fair that you know.”
I wasn’t an idiot; I was pretty sure I knew more or less what he was about to say. “You and Mom have a history, don’t you?”
“Yes, that’s one way to put it. I grew up with both Violet and Gregor. I was close with your father before he abandoned the pack.” He rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Actually, shortly after he left, he sent for me to join him with the Kings.”
My lips pulled away from my teeth. “He did what?”
He nodded. “I more or less had the same disgusted reaction. I told him there was no way in hell I’d abandon my life, my friends, and my family just to have access to a river. From that moment, he was dead to me, but Violet had hope that he would send for you. She wouldn’t have sent you to him, mind you. She loathed him about as much as she loved him, but she expected him to try and take some responsibility for you. Years passed without a word from him, and then we learned that he had another son. Well, that confirmed that Gregor was too far gone. I doubt you remember that time very much, but your mother was inconsolable when she heard about Troy.”
I caught a flicker of a deep, deep memory that I’d completely forgotten about. It had the gleaming undeniability that all core memories had, but I’d buried it so deep that I didn’t know it existed until someone reminded me of it.
“I remember a period when she cried every time she looked at me. It felt like it lasted for a really long time.”
He nodded. “Yes, I’m sorry the memory stayed with you. But that was how it was.”
“She confided in you?”
“Not really. Not at first. Your mother and I had always been friends, but I was closer with Gregor. She and Gregor were the real inseparable ones because they’d acknowledged their mating bond even before they turned twenty. After he left and Peter took over, our relationship became more distant. I escaped into my studies rather than face reality, but your mother wasn’t like that. She challenged Peter constantly, and secretly disobeyed his orders. She became a pillar of strength for the pack.
“I, like everyone else, just assumed that she had gotten over Gregor. But I should have known better because even I hadn’t recovered from the loss of my best friend. I went on, completely ignorant of the truth until I happened to pass by her cabin late one night. I heard her letting out these deep, deep sobs, and I finally understood how much she had been suffering. I forgot that we weren’t close anymore, and knocked on the door. She tried to hide it even after I told her that I’d overheard, but when you started to cry in your crib, she broke down again. That night rekindled our friendship. We’ve only grown closer over the years.”
“You keep mentioning your friendship and your closeness,” I said. “But there’s more now, isn’t there?”
“Ah, that’s where I have to admit that I’m not sure myself.” I’d never seen a man his age blush until now. “I would like for there to be something…else, something more. But you know how seriously she takes mating bonds. I don’t want to ask her to compromise her morals for me. And to be honest, I’m not entirely sure that she feels that strongly about me.”
I would have rolled my eyes if I didn’t think it would be disrespectful. He must have forgotten that I’d seen the way she was looking at him when she woke up. Honestly, it was a little funny to see older wolves struggle with the same issues of the heart that younger wolves did.
“I think you should try and talk to her about this. And when you do, you can let her know that I gave you direct permission as your Alpha.”
“You aren’t upset about my feelings for your mother, Night?”
“No.” I was a bit surprised by that myself, but it was true. “I’m surprised to hear all of this, but upset? No. I think you’re a good man, and after watching you treat her wounds, I know that you would treat her the way she deserves. You were there for her when my father abandoned her, and I know you’ll be there for her when—if I don’t walk away from this fight. It’s important to me that my mother is around people who love and care about her. It’s obvious to me that you’ve got both in spades. I couldn’t imagine a better man than you, Doc.”
He stared at me for a long time, and I thought I might have seen a shimmering twinkle in his eye. For one awkward second, I tried to prepare myself for the reality that he might be about to come to tears, but he laughed instead and patted my shoulder.
“You’re an incredible man and an incredible Alpha, Night,” he said. “Take it from someone who’s been around to witness the three who ruled before you.”
“Thank you. Take care of my mother, Tavi, and Bryn, alright?”
