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“Is something the matter?” Hera glanced between the crestfallen pair. “Are these not the treasures you desire?”
“No. I mean yes. I mean…” Zephyr ran a hand through his windswept hair, and shook his head. “I’m not sure, really. I always thought obtaining my hero’s license would be a dream come true. But something feels like it’s missing...”
“Hmmm.” Hera paced along the marble floors, deep in thought, before she smiled knowingly at the pair. “If that’s the case, perhaps you should remember what you’ve learned on your adventure.”
Zephyr scratched his head. “That too many meat buns are bad for my cholesterol?”
“No, Zephyr. You must remember that the greatest treasure in the world isn’t an object of riches, or power, or status. It’s love.” Hera glanced between the pair, while her eyes twinkled in the starlight. “Enjoy the party, heroes.”
At once, the revelers resumed their festivities, until the palace of Olympus was filled with merry-making once more. Zephyr yelped as a sea of well-wishers and social climbers fought for his attention like a tug of war, each desperate to hear juicy tidbits of his grand adventures, before he stumbled towards the dancefloor. He searched through the swaying crowd, trying to spot Iris, before a melodic voice filled the air, and a hand grabbed his.
“Zephyr? Our hero!”
Zephyr balked in surprise as nine radiant women surrounded him. Each of them wore flowing silk chiffon robes that highlighted the curves of their body, while their perfectly styled hair gently billowed in an invisible breeze that carried faint notes of an enchanting melody. One by one, their painted lips curved into a smile, while their beautiful, bewitching eyes were focused on him.
“The… Muses…“ Zephyr stuttered in surprise, convinced this must be some kind of cosmic misunderstanding. “Wait, I’m your hero?”
“Of course you are. Why, you’re the most popular hero in all of Olympus!” Zephyr’s eyes widened in shock as Calliope, the leader of the group, leaned in suggestively, while her retinue fussed and fawned over him. “You must tell us everything. Was it dangerous? Did you overcome Herculean trials, and single-handedly fight armies of foul beasts?”
“Well, not exactly… I was more of a meddler…” Zephyr’s stomach rumbled as he inhaled the irresistible scent of fried onions, before he plucked a hot dog from a passing waiter. “But all that work sure built my appetite!”
As Zephyr squirted a dollop of mustard onto the bun, the Muses collectively gasped in horror at the sight of the snack. He yelped in surprise as Calliope slapped the hot dog from his hands, before he turned to her in confusion.
“Hey, what are you doing–”
“You’re a hero now, Zephyr. Which means you need to look and act the part.” Calliope flashed Zephyr a smile that reminded him of a crocodile before it devoured its prey. “From now on, there’ll be no more meat buns, and plenty more of these.”
Zephyr looked in despair as Calliope passed him a glass of sludgy green juice.
“Kale smoothies?” He took a sip, and grimaced at the bitter slimy taste. “Ugh, this tastes like a Titan’s toe fungus…”
“Come now, Zephyr, you’ll have to get used to this if you want to be a hero.” Calliope placed a hand on his chest, and batted her eyelashes suggestively. “Isn’t this what you wanted?”
“I guess…”
“Good. Hera has put us in charge of your press tour, which means we have no time to waste.” Calliope clicked her fingers, like an army general summoning the Muses to attention. “Melpo, measure him for a new set of robes, and burn these mustard-stained rags in the hearth. Clio, get him booked into Ares’ Boot Camp right away. And Urania, would you stop staring at your reflection for once, and do something about that wind-swept hair of his?”
Zephyr’s heart sank as the Muses disappeared in a flurry of their silken robes. So much for being a hero. If Calliope and her Muses had their way, they would change every single part of him. He gazed at the party glumly, feeling more alone than ever despite the crowds, and paced along the overflowing banquets, longingly looking at every forbidden deep-fried treat. As his stomach rumbled in protest, he checked the coast was clear, and snuck a hot dog in his pocket, before Calliope could spot him. But he paused as he spotted a lone figure in the distance, who sent rainbows arcing across the clouds like skimming stones.
“Iris?” Zephyr drifted away from the party, before he joined the Goddess of Rainbows. “I was worried you’d be halfway across the world, picking fights with leprechauns by now.”
“I thought I’d stay and see what all the fuss is about.” But Iris sighed as she watched the festivities unfold. “Although this party isn’t as fun as I thought it would be.”
“You can say that again.” Zephyr’s heart sank, before he returned his gaze to Iris. “You know, I’ve been thinking. I know we’ve reached the end of our adventure with the Sons of Olympus. But what if…”
“Zephyr? There you are!”
Zephyr groaned as Calliope and her retinue of Muses marched towards him. He held up his hands in peace, and glanced guiltily at the hot dog stuffed in his robes.
“I haven’t eaten any meat buns, I swear!”
“I should hope not! Now quit dawdling and get yourself to the Heroes Bar, pronto. We’ve assembled every journalist this side of Olympus, and they’re dying to hear about your heroic exploits.” Calliope’s mouth thinned as she took in Zephyr’s wind-swept appearance. “But first, we need to get you into hair and makeup. Perhaps something from Aphrodite’s beauty drawer will help you look the part…”
“I guess…” A wave of dread washed over Zephyr at the thought, until he glanced at Iris. “Aren’t you coming too? We’re a team, remember?”
But despite the sparkle in Iris’ eyes, Calliope shook her head dismissively.
“Sorry, Zephyr, but it’s a heroes-only policy. And that technicolor troublemaker doesn’t have a license.” Calliope sneered dismissively at Iris. “The Heroes Bar has standards to maintain, after all.”
