Page 73 of Every Breath After


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Closing the bathroom door, I lock it, but leave the lights off as I turn my back to the door and sink down on my butt.

I only have seven numbers in my contacts:

Mom’s cellphone.

Our house phone.

Chickie’s.

O’Leary’s—Gavin’s bar.

His cellphone.

Linda’s cellphone.

And the Montgomerys.

I scroll down and hit what I want without hesitation. The phone starts ringing as I press it to my ear. With my free arm, I wrap it around my bent knees, curling myself into a ball.

Just when I think I’m going to get the answering machine, there’s a click, and a quiet, shaky voice answering, “Mason?”

“Jeremy,” I croak, my voice breaking.

A beat passes, then. “Hey.”

“How’d you know it was me?” I say, sniffling.

“Caller ID. Saw your number come up,” he whispers. A beat passes, then, “Um, are you—Izzy’s not here. It’s…it’s just me.”

I bunch my face, shaking my head, glad it was him who answered, and not his parents. Not Izzy. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, but I don’t want her or anyone else to hear it.

“Mase?”

I sniff loudly, and a short noise bursts out of me, half-laugh, half-sob.

“What’s wrong? Are you okay? Is it your Mom?”

“N-no, I’m fine. We’re fine,” I manage to get out. “I…I have a brother.”

My words are met with silence. I even look to make sure the phone didn’t die or the call disconnect.

“A brother?” Jeremy finally says, sounding just as confused as I’m sure he looks right now.

Nodding against the door, I say, “Yeah. My dad… He, uh, left him on our front porch.”

Again, more silence.

Then, “Did you…did you see him?”

Knowing he means my dad, I shake my head. But then I remember he can’t see me, and I force the words out, “No. He just…dropped him off and left.”

“I’m…I’m sorry, Mason.”

I squeeze my eyes shut, feeling tears leak down my face. I try to keep it to myself, I do. But when I try to speak, all that comes out is a hitched sob.

I’m twelve. I shouldn’t be crying like a little baby.

I don’t know what’s wrong with me.

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