Page 15 of Every Breath After


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She also hates being alone.

Social butterfly.

That’s what grown-ups call her.

I’m the one with social issues.

So, even if there is someone out there for me and just me… how do I find them? How do I make them my friend? What happens when I don’t want to play the games other kids play?

“I promise,” I say out loud, my voice quiet. I lift my gaze to my sister’s, nodding, standing a little taller.

Either way, I’ll always have her.

That I can count on.

She’s my best friend.

She smiles, and she gets that look in her eye that tells me she’s up to no good. “We have to spit on it.”

I bunch up my face, and she giggles loudly.

“Kiss your knuckles like this—I saw it in a movie. They said it doesn’t count if you don’t do this.”

I don’t know if I believe that, but I also know she won’t listen to me if I try to tell her she’s wrong.

I follow her lead lowering my mouth to where my thumb curls into my fingers.

She kisses the side of her hand first. Then I do the same.

Then she turns her head to the right, spitting at the air.

I twist to the left and do the same.

At least we’re outside…

She laughs again, louder and more wild this time. “Now it’s official!”

She releases my hand and spins away from me, twirling barefoot in the wet grass and dirt. Long, wavy brown hair whirling around her head.

Arms hanging at my sides, I tip my head back to stare up at the sparkling night sky.

Distantly, from the house, Daddy calls for us. It’s completely dark out now, lit up only by the stars, the moonlight, and the lights shimmering gold around our treehouse.

Izzy yells, “Comin’!” and starts to make her way back through the trees bordering our backyard.

Just before I drop my head and turn to follow, a star shoots across the sky.

My chest rises with my deep inhale, and I close my eyes super tight, just like I do when blowing out candles on my birthday cake. Izzy always blows hers out before mine. But I take my time, making sure I get my wish just right.

I wish…

“JJ, come on!” Izzy huffs impatiently.

Ignoring her, I throw my request out at the star racing across the sky…

Hoping.

Praying.

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