“Yeah, well… I didn’t really get a chance to tell you.”
I nod, but just barely. I still don’t like what he did, and knowing it isn’t even an isolated incident, that there’s a pretty good likelihood he’ll do something to hurt someone again if the Blue Bloods tell him to…
Swallowing, I look up at him. “Does stuff like this happen… often?”
He smirks faintly, crossing his arms and leaning in the doorway. “No. You caught us in a particularly busy season.”
“How does it work?” I ask softly.
He doesn’t answer me immediately. He’s quiet for long enough that I think he might not, and if he doesn’t, I know I have to be okay with that, but it still feels weird.
Finally, though, he does speak.
“When one of us has a problem, our brothers help us out with it. Whatever that means. It isn’t always bloody. It could be something as above-board as Silvan hooking me up with that investment opportunity so I could generate some money of my own when he knew I wasn’t financially solid like the rest of them were. The scope of the work is limitless. It could be anything.”
“Is it just while you’re in college?”
“No.”
I nod soberly, dropping my bag back on the ground.
“This weekend was just a taste, though,” he says.
I look back up at him.
“You can do anything once you’re hooked up with these guys. Get anything done. The network available to you… it’s unparalleled.”
“I understand the appeal,” I say softly.
“The way I see it, in this world, there are two options. You can be a king, or you can be a pawn. I want to be the one who can get shit done, take care of what’s mine, build a fucking empire. I don’t have a problem with getting my hands dirty if that’s what it takes.”
He says the last part firmly, so I know where he stands.
I swallow. “So, you can’t guarantee nothing like that will happen again.”
“No.”
“Even if innocent people could get hurt.”
He sighs, but I can tell it’s just frustration that we’re not going to agree on this. “I’m not a fucking hero, Brynn. I know you want me to be, but I’m not. I’m not some sick fuck, either. I don’t have a desire to hurt anyone, but I’ll do what has to be done to accomplish my goals and protect what’s mine. I make no apologies for that.”
“I wasn’t yours when Kyle… messed with me,” I point out.
“No, you weren’t. But you are now. My protection is retroactive.”
The reality still makes me a little sad, but it doesn’t change my feelings for him. It doesn’t make me want to leave this time.
I walk over to him, sliding my hand along his muscular chest and over his powerful shoulders, then winding my arms around his neck. “We should get ready for bed,” I say softly.
“Yeah?”
I nod.
He tips my chin up, sliding his hand along my jaw and bringing me in for a kiss. “You’re not gonna run off on me again, are you?” he murmurs.
“No. I’m sorry I did before, it was just… a lot.”
“I understand.”