AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“You two are awful,” I whisper.
Lena grins at me. “We love you anyway, you dinkus.”
“‘Dinkus’? Is that a word?” I laugh—but between one breath and the next I start crying again.
Again.
God, why?
Why do I care so much?
I know August is a hollowed-out grouch with a heart smaller than a peanut. But I also know that when his temper snaps, sometimes he says things he doesn’t mean.
Why am I so upset then?
Because he did mean it.
Because you’re a loud, annoying, chaotic intrusion, and you think if you just act like you don’t care, then the people who find you annoying and obnoxious won’t hurt you.
He’s struck one of my deepest insecurities, the one that I’ve never been able to face myself.
All shoved at me by the one man I wanted to like me more than anything.
With a panicked sound, Lena jumps to her feet, her chair scraping. “Hey—hey, okay, we’re out of tissues, hold on.” She dips into the kitchen and snatches a wad of paper, thrusting it at me. “There we go. Paper towel time.”
I take the paper towels and scrub my face.
They’re scratchy, but I don’t care.
“Sorry, guys—sorry I’m such a mess, I just—”
Lena snorts.
“Stop apologizing, girl.” Her voice is harsh, but her touch soothes as she squeezes my shoulder. “That man bought himself a fiancée, and you had to go and be dumb enough to fall in love with him for real.”
She says it with such certainty.
And it echoes inside me with an awful clarity, something that should feel wonderful and beautiful, but right now it’s chokingly bittersweet.
God help me.
I love August Marshall.
I love his angry, grumpy, heart-thieving butt, when I’m nothing to him but a minuscule fly in his orbit.
“Well, when you put it that way ...” I give Lena a lopsided smile.
“Was the sex worth it, at least?” She plunks back down in her chair.
“Lena!” Gran gasps.
I wrinkle my nose. “I mean, it was good ...”
Gran looks faint, a hand fluttering to her chest. “I cannot know this about my granddaughter. While I know you two impertinent kids are just riling me up, let’s change the subject.”
My smile is a little more rueful as I wipe the last tears away with the paper towel. “I actually think I’m going to go up and lie down. I’m starting to get a headache behind my eyes. I think I have a date with my meds and the blackout blinds if I want to stave off another attack.”
“Of course, dear.” Gran reaches over to squeeze my hand again. “I meant to send this one home, anyway.” She swats Lena’s shoulder lightly. “Go take those muffins to your mother, you vulgar child.”
