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I wasn’t sure that made me feel any better about it. But my father had always ruled with a heavy hand, which included expecting his wife to agree with him in all things.
“You know, I always thought your father cut you off more because you dared defy him rather than because he had a problem with the club. But of course, he used self-righteous bullshit to justify it all. Part of me thinks he kept waiting for you to fail and come home with your tail between your legs, so he could tell you I told you so. You doing well just pissed him off further.”
I often thought the same. Yes, my parents went to church, and my father was socially conservative, but he seemed to apply his views as he saw fit rather than according to any ideology. Hell, I could remember my dad encouraging me to “hit it” with every cheerleader I could in order to sow my wild oats in high school. So why now was there such shame over what I’d chosen to do? And more importantly, why did I let it affect me, even a decade later?
“Will you be at the wedding?” I asked Fran.
“Wouldn’t miss it. Kate ensured we would attend by coming in here to hand deliver the invitation. I even bought a dress and got Dan’s old suit cleaned for the occasion.”
“I’d love to sit with you both.”
“And we’d love to sit with you. Let me check on your food, honey.”
Chapter Twelve
Oakley
I hadn’t wanted to leave Max up in the room alone. Although I wasn’t close with my parents, I couldn’t imagine not being able to pick up the phone to call either one of them if I was upset, happy, or simply missed them. They might have established new lives without me since the divorce, but I knew either one of them would be on a plane in a heartbeat if I really needed them. Max’s mother wouldn’t even hug him.
I eyed his mom over the breakfast table in the hotel restaurant, sensing a sadness about her. Max’s father had always been a hard man who loved to hear himself talk, but his mother had been warm, friendly, and always about her two kids. But she’d changed.
Kate slid into the seat beside me. “Hey, what’s up with you and Shawn? Someone said he was angry with you last night.”
I let out a breath. Since she’d brought it up, perhaps it was best to tell her the truth. “I wanted to wait until after the weekend to tell you this, but—
She held up her hand. “No, no, no. I don’t want to hear it. You two need to get along for this wedding. I mean it. Work out your problems, so I don’t have to deal with them. I have enough happening with my own family. I don’t want to deal with any more drama, so figure out how to get along. Apologize.”
“Apologize for what?”
“For whatever it takes to keep the peace. And don’t ask me to set you up again with anyone.”
I didn’t remember having asked in the first place. Now I wondered if Shawn had been telling the truth about doing Kate a favor in asking me out.
But I held my tongue. It was clear she didn’t want to hear it. Our friendship was feeling the strain. It wouldn’t surprise me if we ended up doing no more than exchanging yearly holiday cards and occasional Facebook posts in the coming years. Meanwhile, I had to get through this weekend.
“We’ll get along. Best behavior, I promise.”
“Good. Are you excited about going to the spa?” she asked, changing the subject.
“You bet.” At least I wouldn’t have to see Shawn there.
At the spa, I opted for a simple manicure, not having a lot of extra cash to spend on extravagant treatments. Afterward, I simply had fun hanging out with Kate and our other friends. Between the spa and the rehearsal, I’d hoped to see Max up in the room, but he wasn’t in sight. After changing over into my black cocktail dress, I went downstairs to catch a ride to the church with the three other bridesmaids.
My day had been great up until the point I had to deal with Shawn again at the church. I scrutinized his over-gelled hair, over-bleached teeth, and brand-name trousers, which were too tight around his thighs. How had I thought he was attractive? Perhaps once someone showed how ugly they were on the inside, there was no hiding it on the outside.
“Hey, slut,” he whispered sidling up so only I could hear him.
I didn’t bother to turn toward him. Thankfully, Max had given me new confidence when it came to dealing with assholes like Shawn. “Is a woman a slut when she doesn’t sleep with you? I’m so confused by the slut-shaming rules these days.”
“Where’s your boy toy? Did he get tired of faking things with you for my benefit?”
“Man, I can’t keep up. First, I’m a slut. Then I’m not sleeping with you or him? So hard to keep track. As for Max, there’s nothing fake about him.” I let the innuendo drop though I knew it was childish to stoop to Shawn’s level.
“I’m sure the men he fucks enjoy it,” he snarled.
I pivoted so I could make eye contact. “Why, Shawn, you sound almost too defensive. Almost like you’ve been entertaining some deep-seated fantasies. Is that what this is all about? You’re jealous because Max is more into me than you?”
My words had their desired effect when his entire face turned red, making me think I couldn’t be entirely off base. “Shut up.”
