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“Yes, but when they showed up, they needed seven.”
“Ok. Thanks, Trina.” I guess I’ll let her have my room, and I’ll sleep on the couch.
“Why, hello there, Mr. Cowboy.” Barbara approaches me from behind.
“Hey, Barb. How’s it going?” I turn to face her. I want to keep her hands where I can see them.
“Not bad. Not a bad view here.” She looks me up and down.
“Are you going on the hike?”
“Wouldn’t miss it.”
“Great. I’ve got a few things to do before then. Everyone will meet on the porch in about 15 minutes.
“Is Ava coming?”
“I believe so, and my daughter, Mia. She was at school when you ladies arrived.”
“Wonderful. I'll be available if you ever decide to upgrade to something more seasoned and experienced. I’ll even let you have a test drive.” She winks at me.
“There you are!” Ava comes out of nowhere, like my knight in shining armor.
“Hey, babe.” I put my arm around her shoulder. “Join me in the office? We have a few things to look over before we go on our hike.”
“Sure.”
We head through the kitchen and into my office. A shiver runs down my spine. “That lady really lays it on thick. I will have to make sure I’m never alone with her. She was propositioning me again!”
“No way! Even after she knows we’re together?”
“Yeah. She offered her services in case I wanted to trade you in.”
“Wow. Who talks like that?”
“Knock, knock. Am I interrupting you two lovebirds?” Roberta peeks her head in.
“Not at all, and you can stop calling us that.”
“I'm just trying to keep it realistic! Anyway, I’m planning dinner for 6:30. I just want to make sure you’ll be back in time.”
“Yes, of course. Thanks.”
“Well, we’d better get on with it then.” I head out to the porch to start gathering the ladies. After about 5 minutes of small talk, everyone is here.
“Ladies, can I have your attention for a few? Is everyone here who wants to come?”
“Yes, we’re all here!” One of the ladies shouts.
“Great. Just a few ground rules. We’re going on a hike, not too far and not strenuous–but there is wildlife that you’ll have to be aware of. You’re going to want to make sure you stay on the path. Don’t veer off into grassy areas. Let’s stay close together. If you want to see wildlife, be as quiet as you can. If you don’t want to see wildlife, be loud. Lastly, does everyone have our number programmed into their phones? I’m going to hand out some whistles, too. This is just in case we get separated or you get into trouble or something. Two quick blows mean to look for you; three quick blows are for an emergency. Got it?” Ava and Mia take the whistles from me and hand them out to the ladies.
“Got it!”
“If I get lost, will you rescue me?” Barb asks in a sultry voice.
“We’ll stay together, so we’ll all be looking for you!” Ava jumps in, trying to shut her down. “Alright, let’s go!”
I lead them to the trailhead nearest the house. The trail is pretty easy and only about a mile and a half, perfect for the first hike. The ladies chatter away until we get a little further into the wooded area. Even though botany isn't my strongest suit, I point out interesting plants and trees along the way.
