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“I just … my mom left me with some shit to deal with,” I say to the group, trying to ignore the murderous glare of Alana.
Gabrielle gives me a sympathetic smile. “Oh, you want to discuss shitty moms? Cass and I here can commiserate.”
I can tell that Alana is about to explode at any moment, and I don’t need crying children or forlorn mothers around here, so I spill.
“Basically, she left me strapped with fifty thousand dollars of debt to my back. Her mortgage is upside down, and I can’t sell the house right now or I’d owe more. So I’m trying to decide between staying here and working round the clock to pay it off, which will take me years. Or do I move and take one of the job offers I have, knowing I’ll basically have to pay rent for an apartment plus the mortgage here. Plus, all of my other living expenses. It’s just … I’m overwhelmed. It’s left me in a really bad spot.”
“That fucking bitch.” Alana’s jaw drops at what I’ve told her.
“Funny, that’s what your husband said.”
“I would apologize for her, but I’ve been around long enough to see how she terrorized you. I’m so sorry, Auggy. This isn’t fair at all.” Cass reaches across the table to squeeze my hand.
“Wow, that’s fucked up. And there is nothing you can try to do about the sale? I had to deal with my grandmother’s estate after she passed, it was complicated. The lawyer should be able to give you some options.” Gabrielle adjusts her infant to burp him, and the little guy squirms in her arms.
I shake my head. “Not that he’s told me. I’m pretty much stuck. Now it’s just deciding what to do.”
Alana’s mouth sets into a firm line. “Stop it. I’ll give you a check right now. Warren is a freaking millionaire, for goodness’ sake.”
“I’ll do the same. Take the check and pad your account so you can get a place on your own in whatever city you choose. You won’t have to get a roommate.” Cass begins to reach for her purse.
“I won’t take your money.” My voice is harsh, but they both need to cut it out with this shit.
Sitting among these accomplished women, with their perfect families and happy lives, makes me feel like a charity case. And there is nothing more in this world that I hate more than that.
“August, be reasonable. We can help you with the snap of our fingers. You’re family, and I won’t watch you suffer because your mother was a lousy piece of crap.” Alana is growing irate.
“Hey, calm down.” Gabrielle tries to soothe her.
“This is what I didn’t want to happen.” I bury my face in my hands. “You’re already postpartum and dealing with all of that. I didn’t want to come over here and burden you with my shit.”
“You’re not a burden. Ever,” Alana confirms, reaching out to hold my hand.
“You have so much going on, and don’t offer again. You know I won’t take the money. Save us all this argument.” I level a look at her.
“I wish you would let us help.” Cass sounds disappointed, and that’s what I hate about this.
The pride that comes with doing things on my own, not being associated with the kind of woman my mother was … it means I sacrifice, even if there is an easier way. Sure, could I let them? Absolutely. It would be nothing to them. But that’s the problem. Nothing in this life has ever come free to me, and I’m sure a whole slew of shit would come my way if I accepted a bailout.
Alana stands up so fast that I’m pretty sure she might drop the baby.
“Stay here. Live in the house for free so you’re not paying rent. I know you need to start your career but manage the store for me. Lily has been suffering serious neglect since I gave birth, and the manager now is not doing the best job. She can only come in two days a week. With the business we’re doing now, I need someone full time.”
Alana is talking about her local goods and market that she and Warren opened years ago. It’s her passion project, her first baby, and I’ve fallen in love with so many trinkets and items when I’ve walked in there.
“Put it on your résumé. Manager of a successful small business is no small feat. It shows people you’re a hard worker, and there is all kinds of inventory and planning you have to do to run the store. Take some time to think about your plan and leave whenever you’re ready. But I’d hate to see you commit yourself to a city and a job you’re uncertain about just to start making money, when what you really need is a solid path forward.”
It’s like someone opened a window when the door was slammed in my face. For the first time in damn near a week, I feel a bit of hope about the situation.
“Come on, Auggy. I could really use the help. And you’re the most competent perfectionist I know. You’ll have Lily running in tip-top shape in no time.” She pretends to beg, clasping her hands together.
Truly, it’s the perfect solution. I don’t have to stay forever, but at least that gives me a stream of revenue and regular working hours. Alana claims I can still stay at her place, which solves the matter of not stepping foot in my childhood home. And I can also pick up extra jobs on the weekends or at night. It’s not a permanent fix, but it gives me something while I try to get my head on straight.
“As long as this is a real job offer and not nepotism. You have to actually task me with things and push me to work as hard as you would.” I don’t want her just giving me some title so she can funnel money to me.
“Promise.” Alana holds out her pinky, and I shake it.
“Thank you. This is a huge help.” A weight lifts in my chest, even if it doesn’t completely disappear.
