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Although Kylie had never blamed me for my past, it wouldn’t be easy for a woman with trust issues to see me as that guy she could count on to stay.
I wished I had more time, more chances to prove to her that I was never again going to be that man she’d seen in an orgy picture, baring his ass for the entire world to see.
Unfortunately, I didn’t have that luxury. Since we hadn’t discussed our future and what we wanted, her first instinct after the wedding would be to go back to the States because her life was there. Her business was there. Most of her friends were there.
I was going to have to push my apprehension aside because letting her walk away was not an option.
“Kylie,” I started, trying to ignore the dread that was lodged in my throat. “I know we haven’t really had a chance to discuss what we’re going to do about us after the wedding—”
“Let’s not,” she said in a rush. “Everything is going to be so crazy this week. Can we talk Saturday night after this is all over?”
“Of course,” I assured her. “If that’s what you want.”
All right. So that hadn’t really gone very well.
I wasn’t sure if I was relieved or concerned because she was willing to wait until after the wedding to plan our future.
If we actually had one.
I let out a long breath I hadn’t even realized I’d been holding.
Perhaps it wasn’t a bad thing to give her a little more time to realize that I wouldn’t go back to being an idiot.
I would never go back there, and I had no desire to slip into avoidance anymore.
While I couldn’t say every single one of my demons was slayed, I’d killed off most of those little bastards, and if another rose up, I’d eliminate that one, too.
I wasn’t that man crippled by post-traumatic stress anymore, yet I couldn’t say I was the Dylan Lancaster I’d been before two years ago, either.
I was…different. Changed by my experiences and unable to go back.
And truthfully, I was all right with that.
I was warier, a little harder, and less likely to trust people I didn’t know.
But I was also wiser and more aware of things I’d taken for granted before my life had been turned upside down.
Some of my priories were different, but that felt right, too.
At one point in my life, I’d always put Lancaster International first, just like Damian.
Now, also, just like my twin, my corporation wouldn’t always come first in my life because I’d found someone who was more important than Lancaster International.
“Are we here?” Kylie asked as we pulled into the long driveway of Hollingsworth.
“This is it,” I confirmed. “Are you ready?”
“As ready as I’m ever going to be,” she answered. “Are you?”
I didn’t have to ask what she meant. I hadn’t seen my family since I’d taken control of my mind again, and what in the hell could I say to the people who had stood by me for way longer than they should have?
As we reached the circular part of the drive in front of the house, I could see Damian, Nicole, Leo, and Mum waiting for our arrival.
I squeezed her hand. “More ready than you’ll ever know,” I told her, beyond eager to finally take my place in the Lancaster family again.
