AllFreeNovel
Share Us
She fights a sob. I squeeze her knee, not sure if I should say anything.
Paige wipes her eyes. “She never got over my dad leaving,” she says. “But she never blamed me for it. Mostly just took it out on her liver. Almost all of my memories of us together involve her with a drink in her hand.” She shakes her head. “Eventually, I was just... done. I couldn’t stand to pick up after her anymore, or drive her home when she’d had too much. I got a job that took me... anywhere but where she was.” She pauses, her lips trembling. “Then, one night about four years ago, she called me for a ride home... and I didn’t answer.”
“Four years ago?” I say, my gut clenching.
She nods with fresh tears staining her face. “She called me, but I didn’t answer... because I was with someone.”
“Because you were with me.”
Paige collapses her head again, unable to look me in the eye. “I’m sorry,” she says.
I pause. “For what?”
“After that night, I couldn’t look at you,” she whispers. “I wanted to, but... I didn’t think I deserved... you. Or anybody else.”
“It’s all right,” I say as I brush the tears off her cheeks.
“After what I did to her,” she says through sobs. “I tried to forget that night and everything?—”
I wrap my arms around her. “It’s all right,” I say again.
“Then, this trip happened, and you were just so...”
“Shh.” I hold her closer. “It’s all right.”
She smothers her face in my shoulder as she sobs, each violent shake a stab to my gut.
She’s carried this for four years. After all this time, I thought there was something I’d done wrong, but it was this. I almost wish I had done her wrong. Then she would have had a reason to answer. A reason to leave and change the course of history. I wish I’d known back then. I wish someone would have told me then what happened that night. Then, she wouldn’t have had to go through it alone.
From now on, she won’t.
“Nothing that happened that night was your fault, Paige,” I say, holding her tighter. “Your mother chose to drive.”
Paige pulls away. “No, she wouldn’t have chosen that if I had just answered the phone. She did the right thing. She called me for help, but I was too busy getting laid.”
“You can’t see it that way.”
“Why not?”
“Because it’ll tear you apart,” I say. “Believe me.”
I cup her face, drawing her eyes up again. She fights it at first, then she looks at me with sadness and dread, as if her confession will leave me running away and leaving her.
But I’m not going anywhere.
“Paige, you are incredible,” I say. “You take care of everyone. Who takes care of you?”
“I don’t need anyone to take care of me,” she says.
“Yes, you do.”
I lean closer, close enough to brush our lips together.
“Oliver, don’t,” she whispers, but she doesn’t move.
I kiss her. I taste the salt on her lips. I feel the pain in her tears. I’d give anything to make it all go away.
I join her on the bed. I lie down, taking her with me, never letting her stray too far out of my arms. She rests her head on my chest, tears staining my shirt. But I couldn’t care less about that. I hold her through every vicious sob and crack of her voice. I hold her until she’s too tired to cry anymore and falls asleep.
