Page 163 of Talk Swoony to Me


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“Did she tell you that?” he asks. “Did she whisper all those horrible things in your ear before or after you fucked her behind my back!”

“All right!” I throw up my hands. “We get it! I fucked your little sister, Seth! Frontwards. Backwards. Up and down. Every which way, I hit it and I hit it good.”

“Hey, don’t talk about my sister like that!”

“A sister who wouldn’t have even spoken to you this year if it weren’t for me.”

“And you think that gives you the right to touch her even though you pledged not to?” he says. “How would you feel if I went uptown right now and seduced Melanie? Would you like that?”

“First, good luck,” I say with a laugh. “And second, I didn’t do this to hurt you! I didn’t know she was your sister when I met her.”

“But she was, and you should have shut it down.”

“I tried! But she...” I pause, my heart aching in my chest. “Heidi…”

He points a stiff finger at me. “Don’t say her name.”

“I loved her,” I say. “I fell in love with Heidi and I couldn’t just shut it down.”

Seth shakes his head as he steps back and returns to his post. “Whatever,” he mutters.

“Yeah, whatever,” I say as I snatch the next girl’s ID from her fingers. “Doesn’t matter anymore, anyway.”

I wave her forward as Seth turns toward me again.

“What do you mean?” he asks.

“ID, please,” I say to the next girl in line.

“Drew,” Seth says, forcing my attention. “What do you mean?”

I hand the ID back without checking it. Whatever. I know her from econ.

“I mean, we broke up,” I say. “So, it doesn’t matter. We broke up and now I’m living on my dad’s boat at the marina. You happy? That’s what you wanted, right?”

He pauses, his brow wide and stiff. “She broke up with you or you broke up with her?” he asks.

I don’t answer. I wave to move the line, but Seth shifts forward to block it.

“Hey!” He approaches me with sharp, protective eyes. “You dumped my sister?”

I look up, surprised by his aggressive stance. “Come on, Seth. Pick a lane!”

“You’re telling me that my baby sister is sitting at home with a broken heart on her birthday while you’re here living it up at Delta Xi?! Not cool, man.”

“I’m only here because I have to be. The second this shift is over, I’m gone.”

“Well, would you look at that?” He feigns surprise. “Drew Rose really can follow the rules.”

I grit my teeth. “Screw you, Seth.”

“No, thanks. Wouldn’t want you to be two-for-two.”

I lurch forward within an inch of him, and the lines of people instinctively shift backward to stay out of our way. “Do you want me and her to be together or not?” I ask.

“Not!” he answers.

“Do you want us to be alone and miserable?”

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