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RUBY
“Just ’cause somethin’s a bad idea, don’t mean it won’t be a good time.” ~ Miss Dottie
All night I’d tossed and turned, unable to fall asleep. I’d kept my phone on my pillow to get any updates from Kane or to have it in case Harper needed me. At some point, I must have drifted off because, when I opened my eyes, I saw Kane standing in my doorway.
He was shirtless, wearing only sweats, and his hair was wet. The light from the hall backlit him, making him look like some sort of dark angel. The moonlight from the window illuminated his face and highlighted his dark expression. Something about the look in his eyes had panic rushing through me as I pushed up onto my forearms and squinted. “What’s wrong? Is it Harper?”
“Harper’s fine.” Kane stepped into my room. When he did, I saw that his left arm was wrapped in a sling.
“Oh my God!” I jumped out of bed like I was spring-loaded and rushed to him. I reached up, my hand hovering at his shoulder. “Are you okay!?”
“I’m fine,” he gritted out as his jaw clenched.
His voice was deep and gravelly, sending a shockwave of arousal through me. I instantly felt guilty for getting turned on by his voice when it was most likely so deep because he was in pain.
“What happened?”
“It’s not a big deal.”
My fingers grazed the gauze bandage. “This doesn’t look like not a big deal.”
“I got shot, but the bullet went straight through.”
“Shot?” I repeated the word in a strained whisper.
Tonight was the first real insight I had into what his job meant. What Harmony said to me hit home. She never knew if Hudson was going to come home or not. I had wondered if I’d be able to handle that, and now I had my answer.
I could.
Because the alternative would be not being here the times he did come home. Which, at this moment, I knew was all I wanted. I needed to tell him how I felt, even though he’d given me no indication that he felt the same way about me.
When we were dancing and he told me I looked beautiful, I thought he might declare his feelings for me. When he’d asked about Melody’s job offer, I’d thought he might say he wanted me to stay. He hadn’t. Again, didn’t happen.
There was a good chance that my feelings for him were still unrequited, but now, having a front-row seat to the fragility of mortality and realizing tomorrow wasn’t promised, I knew that I didn’t have a choice. I had to tell him that I loved him.
“Kane, I?—”
“I don’t want to talk,” he growled, cutting me off as his right hand cupped my face and his mouth lowered to mine. His lips brushed mine as he whispered, “I need you, Ruby. I need to be with you. Please.”
His confession and plea sounded pained. Almost as if he hated wanting, or needing me. But at that moment, I didn’t care if that was the case. I wanted and needed him, too.
“Then take me.” I repeated the same permission I’d given the last time we were together.
Before the words left my mouth, his lips crashed against mine. We’d kissed before, but this time, it felt different. Maybe it was because, before this moment, I hadn’t really known just how much I loved the man I’d had a crush on my entire life.
I wasn’t infatuated with the idea of him or a version of him that I’d created in my mind. I loved Kane Kingston, the man he was now—the father, the son, the friend, the police officer. I loved that he’d learned how to braid Harper’s hair in a YouTube video. I loved that he played beauty salon and got his nails painted. I loved how he snuggled on the couch with Bandit and wouldn’t move if Bandit was comfortable. I loved how patient he was with his grandad, even when Otto complained about everything that was done for him.
I loved Kane, and if I couldn’t tell him, I could show him.
As his tongue swirled in my mouth, he stalked forward, backing me up until my calves hit the bed. I sat down and scooted up onto the mattress. Our kiss did not break as he moved and hovered over me. My legs fell apart. As Kane settled between my thighs, I felt him wince as his body tensed.
“Are you okay?” I asked, my lips brushing his. “We don’t have to do this.”
As badly as I wanted him, I would never do anything that would cause him discomfort.
“I need you,” he gritted out again as he braced himself with his good hand and pushed up so he was resting on his knees.
“Okay,” I agreed as I rolled onto my side and then slid off the bed.
