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“It’s my parents. My mother, anyway. She’s the only one who knocks like that. You have to leave. Maybe we can sneak you out the back door.”
Jeremy sits up, and even in my state of panic I take a moment to admire that beautiful torso. Oh, Chief, you can quench my fires anytime. He scrubs his face, then turns to me. “You don’t want them to know I’m here?”
“Uh, not really.”
He actually looks hurt, which is sweet and makes me feel a little guilty. “Would they, like, disown you for having a guy spend the night or something?”
I snort. My mother is many things, but she is not a prude. To my everlasting embarrassment, she presented me with my first box of condoms when I was a sophomore in high school, back when I was too shy to talk to a boy, let alone have sex with one. The condoms expired long before I was ready to use them.
“No,” I tell him. “My mother will flirt with you, and if my stepdad is with her, he’ll try to sell you a car.”
He relaxes. “So they’re just regular parents.” He sits up and swings his legs over the side of the bed, finds his boxers on the floor, and gets into them. I get a magnificent view of his backside as he does, but putting clothes on is sort of the opposite of how I saw this morning going.
He turns to me. “Come on, Blaze. You’re an adult. They probably know you have sex. I’d like to meet them.”
“But I don’t want them to meet you,” I reply.
I follow his lead and grab a robe, regretting that I didn’t fill him in earlier on my train wreck of a family. I’m still half asleep, and I know I’m not communicating well.
The hurt look returns. “Why? Are you embarrassed by me?”
I goggle at him, mouth open and eyes blinking. How could a minor deity like him think that a mere mortal like me would be embarrassed by him? I want to stand on a table in a public place and tell the entire world that I woke up next to this beautiful man this morning—
But maybe not when I’m wearing a bathrobe and he’s wearing boxer shorts and it’s nine a.m. and my crazy mother is at the door.
“What? No,” I insist. “I’m embarrassed by them. For all I know, they’ve got my slacker brother, the stripper girlfriend, and the hyperactive nephews along for the ride. Please trust me. Our relationship is not ready for this.”
Crap, did I just say relationship?
“I mean, you know,” I gesture clumsily between us, “neighbors-with-benefits-whatever thing.”
The knock sounds again. “What the frak, Mom?” I mutter. “It’s barely…” I glance at the clock. It’s past nine. Not actually super late. “Whatever.” I head for the door, but Jeremy grabs me by the arm.
“Stop,” he orders, and I do. “Blaze, we’re keeping it light, and that’s fine. You can introduce me as the plumber for all I care. But I like you, and I’d like to spend more time with you. And I’d like to meet your family.”
“Oh.”
Maybe he really meant it last night when he agreed to see where things go.
Maybe I should at least give us a chance…?
Mom’s sharp rhythmic knock sounds again, driving all other thoughts out of my head. Jeremy cocks his head. “What’s it going to be?”
I cave. How can I not?
“Put on some pants,” I order. “It’s time to meet the parents.”
* * *
“Well, hello.”
Mom’s gaze slides right past me to Jeremy. She turns, shifts the pan she’s carrying to one arm, and gives me a not-at-all-subtle thumb’s up. “I hope we’re not interrupting anything?” she asks hopefully.
Marty hovers on the porch right behind her, a broad smile on his face and another pan in his arms. Mercifully, there’s no sign of any other family member.
“Um, Mom, Marty, I’d like you to meet my neighbor, Jeremy Wainwright. Jeremy, this is my mom, Lori, and my stepdad, Marty.”
Hands are shaken all around. In the shuffle, Marty and Mom work their way into the house. They’re like vampires. Once they’ve crossed the threshold, they’re very difficult to get rid of. I should have told Jeremy to block the entrance, but he’s so polite he probably wouldn’t have.
